Damian's Birth

We are coming up on Damian's first birthday and the year has flown by so quickly. I started his birth story a while ago and would go back to it every once in a while. It is something I wanted to do for myself, for Kevin and for him. Who knows if he will ever be interested in how he made his first appearance into the world but if he is I want him to know that every contraction was offered up for him. I want him to know that we think the world of him and I wanted the very best for him right from the start. I wrote it how I remember it and there are parts that everyone might not be comfortable reading. You have been warned!

I have debated about posting this for a while and have finally decided I will (obviously). I am posting it not because I want everyone to think I am strong for having an unmedicated birth and not because I want a pat on the back. I am posting it to show a part of our family that we are very proud of and that unmedicated labor is not a mystery. In our culture childbirth has become such a scary thing. I used to love watching the baby story but now it isn't fun. They show the fast drama filled labor that makes for good tv and usually scares the daylights out of most people watching. Labor should be a normal part of a woman's life. I'm not saying it should be easy, because it wasn't for me, but I am saying we should talk about it more! I know there are exceptions to the "normal" delivery and thank God for the medical interventions that have saved a couple of my friends and their sweet children, but they should be an exception! In this country it is becoming (or has become) the opposite. I guess my bet advice for any one who is pregnant would be do your homework! Don't go in expecting your doctor to do everything exactly right. I am no saying to not listen to him/her, but make sure you know there are other options and you and the doctor are making the decisions you want for yourself and baby. While ultimatly the most important thing is a healthy baby and healthy mother it does matter how you get there!


At the beginning of my pregnancy I was so excited! I think we called everyone we ever met/ emailed to let them know our little Dami was coming. Every change was so exciting and though I didn't need them I started wearing maternity pants when I was only about 11 weeks along. I bought/ read every book I could and was on the internet way more than was necessary searching and researching everything I could about birth and babies. I knew going into it I wanted an unmediated birth and I have known since well, forever, that my kids would be breastfed. My favorite books were the Dr. Sears Baby Book and Pregnancy Book, Natural Birth the Bradley Way and The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. These books really helped me sort out all the ideas I had in my head and reaffirmed some of Kevin and my beliefs about parenting and birth, since not all of them are very mainstream.

By the end of my pregnancy I was just so excited to meet Dami and I wanted him to come right then! For about 3 weeks every evening after work I would have contractions for a few hours, nothing to strong just enough to get my hopes up. I spent those evenings on my birth ball which played a vital roll in getting me through labor. I think I called Ashli our Doula every night just in case, at first excited and after a few weeks feeling a little down. She was wonderful and reminded me of everything we had talked about, how my body was just getting ready. She would give suggestions like walking or resting, getting on my birth ball or taking a shower.  Every morning I would go into work and walk the long hall to my classroom and all of my coworkers would poke their heads out and say "I thought for sure you wouldn't be here today!" Every evening I would go home knowing that it wouldn't happen but praying that it would. My mom kept reminding me that he wasn't ready yet and "Damian and God's timing was the PERFECT time."

The weekend of February 18th my parents drove in from Arlington. I was already 2-3 centimeters dilated and 70% effaced, and we thought it was only a matter of time until I would start active labor. The plan was for my mom to be in the delivery room with us and we didn't want her to miss it. Well we had a wonderful and relaxing weekend filled with lots of walking. The weekend then turned into longer! They cooked us dinner and cleaned around the house, my dad even reorganized our kitchen. Even though we knew better Kevin and I started to feel a little guilty that they had stayed with us so long without Dami making his appearance. We did a little shopping and I even got a manicure and pedicure. After 9 days of staying with us and no Dami they decided they would head home on Sunday, February 24th and just come back when I went into labor. Damian was due on February 25th.

I think I read some where that only like 3% of babies are actually born on there due dates and Damian is one of them. We joke that it is the first time a Sisk has ever been on time. What a day it was! The night before we went to student mass at St. Elizabeth's and that is where the contractions began. We didn't think to much of it because it was just another evening with more contractions. After mass I was wanting some ice cream so we walked down to Cold Stone and I got a wonderful ice cream, sweet cream with honey, cinnamon and caramel! After that we walked back to the car and then headed home.

After a few hours of contractions I could tell that these weren't the same as my other ones and Kevin called my parents to let them know we thought tomorrow would be the day but we would keep them posted. We called Ashli to let her know and she said to keep her updated and she would line up some to watch her kids just incase. That night was wonderful, it was me and Kevin working together to bring our little boy into this world. He brought me water and massaged my back. He got the shower ready for me and timed my contractions. At about 1 I felt like I could lay down and rest for a while and instead of Kevin climbing in bed with me he was too nervous and sat on the floor next to me "just to rest" with his watch in hand.

The next morning I was up about 6 or so and the contractions were still coming. This let us know that it was really the day. Up until this point if I had slept they would stop. My parents were going to work until 10:30 and then making the drive back up to Lubbock. Kevin called into work and his boss said they didn't have anyone to cover his spot and he would still need to come in. He tried back a few times but then I told him just to go in for a few hours. He didn't want to (and I didn't want him to) but he started to get ready. Right before he left, his boss called back and said they had it covered.

We ate breakfast and tried to relax and about 9 am the contractions started to get where I couldn't talk through them anymore and I had to stop what I was doing. I stayed on the birth ball in the living room of our little house or walked around. Ashli was kept up to date and she was ready to come over when ever we were ready. I was still doing ok without her so we held off. At about 10 my water broke. By eleven I was needing a change of pace and asked Kevin to get a shower going. The shower felt great! The water really was soothing on my belly until a really strong contraction came. This was the first time I panicked. "Kevin call Ashli, I need her now." He helped me dry off from the shower and I got back into a rhythm on the ball. The contractions were coming only a few minutes apart and I could feel Dami was pretty low in my pelvis.

We decided about 12 it was time to go to the hospital. We gathered our bag and ball and nursing pillow and headed out in to the windy weather. On the way Kevin called Ashli and asked her to meet us up at the hospital instead of at our house. It is only about a 6 minute drive from our house to the hospital and it seemed kind of surreal. Everyone else on the road was just having a normal day driving around Lubbock, and we were driving to meet our sweet little boy for the first time. It was wonderfully scary!

When we got to the hospital there was NO parking. It turns out it was the busiest day at UMC in history and they were even turning non-emergency patients away. Kevin offered to drop me off and go park, but I didn't want to be alone. We parked way out and he managed to carry everything in while I waddled along side him. Every few minutes we had to stop so I could rock back in forth during the contractions. Ashli met us at the elevators and we headed up to triage. Kevin picked up the phone and told them we had called ahead and I was in labor, they buzzed us in. The nurse was kind of harsh and said only one person could go in the room with me. We explained that she was our doula and she said until I was admitted only one person could come. Ashli waited in the waiting room. I put the gown on and the nurse checked me. She said "oh you are already at a 3 1/2 or 4" I was annoyed/shocked that I wasn't farther along. Since I had been at a 3 1/2 the Wednesday before at the doctors office I thought for sure I would have made more progress. They said the were admitting me and the nurse, who ended up being very nice, said Ashli could come in if we wanted. We called her in and she helped me focus on relaxing while I had contractions. I would tense my face up and not even realize it and Kevin and Ashli kept having to remind me to "relax your face." We still joke every once and a while using this phrase because they had to say it so many times. The triage beds were very uncomfortable and hard and I want to be moving around. They had to have the monitor on me for what seemed like forever, but it was finally time to move to labor and delivery.

They wheeled me into to L&D and I met my nurse. I got in bed there, got my hep-loc (the needle for the IV) and they monitored for a few more minutes and then I was able to get out of the bed. The gowns don't offer very much privacy and Ashli offered to get me another one to wear around the back too. This worked out great while I sat on the birth ball. Kevin and Ashli raised the bed and got me a pillow to lean against while I sat on the ball. They both switched massaging my back and giving me support in different ways while we worked through the contractions. During the breaks the nurse kept asking me to sign things. I know it was necessary but man, not a good time to read over paper work. I just had Kevin make sure it was okay and I quick signed it.

After a while had passed Ashli asked if I needed to go to the bathroom, while I wasn't really sure, I said yes just because of the fact that it had been a while since the last time I had gone. Right after one contraction ended I headed to the bathroom, went and headed back out. Right as I opened the door another one started and I didn't know what to do. I had been in a routine on the birth ball and was able to work with the contractions rocking back and forth, knowing that they were moving that sweet boy closer to being in my arms, but coming out of the bathroom I had another moment of panic! Thankfully Kevin and Ashli were right there. Ashli immediately told me to put my weight on a dresser next to me and rock my hips, I was able to focus again on relaxing while my body did the work.

Time continued to pass and my legs started to shake like they used to after a good work out during basketball. I mentioned this and Ashli said this is usually a sign that I was close to pushing. She asked if I wanted to have a nurse come in and check and I did. The nurse came in and said I she was going to get the doctor and I should have the urge to push coming soon, and boy did it come! That feeling is like nothing I can describe relief and pain all in the same feeling. Not being able to stop and wanting to all in the same breath. Dr. Casanova came in and he had already read over our birth plan and was such a kind man. He told me exactly what was going on through the whole pushing stage. While they were setting everything up I was really wanting to push, Ashli told me to blow like a was trying to keep a feather in the air right about my mouth. It was about the last thing I was wanting to do but it worked! It gave the nurses enough time to get set up and then we were set. They had to turn the birth bar around so that I could hold onto it while pushing but still be in a position that Dr. Casanova could catch Dami.

Who is the last person I would be thinking about right then, but somehow did, Rachel Ray. Ashli brought Rachel Ray brand Olive Oil to help so I wouldn't tear and we all got a kick out of this, well maybe I didn't right then but it is pretty funny. My mom thinks we should write into her show and maybe she would give us a life supply of it.

The time was here, what we had been waiting on for 9 or more months. We were about to meet our son and with Kevin by my side God gave me the strength to push like I had never done before.  I tried to stay focused but a few times in between pushes I just held on to the bar and said "it hurts, it hurts, it hurts" over and over again. I wanted nothing more than for it to all end but knew I still had work to do to see that sweet baby. It only took about 15 minutes though it felt much longer and at 3:45 I pushed my sweet son out and was able to see him. The plan was to leave his umbilical cord attached until it stopped pulsing and nurse him right away, but it was too short, so the doctor offered to let Kevin cut it and he was placed on my chest!

He immediately had his eyes opened and just looked up at me, he started rooting around and latched on the best he could. That was the start of him in this world, the start of breastfeeding, the start of so many wonderful emotions! I will never forget the look of awe and wonder in Kevin's face as he stood next to me staring at our sweet son who had already changed our lives forever!